As I discussed Proverbs 3: 5-6 tonight during Bible study, I was sharing how acknowledging God is speaking who He is: The Great I Am that I Am, the first and the last, the sovereign God…acknowledging He is this big God.
THEN, for the first time in all my years studying this verse, it hit me – or rather was revealed to me – that acknowledging God in all my ways is trusting that His plan is best…His way is best.
Acknowledging God is surrendering to His will and being obedient to that will – even if we don’t understand it. But we trust Him to the point that whatever the outcome, we know he’s got us and we’re safe.
It’s, “Not my will, but thy will be done.” I acknowledge you not just to get me to the destination, but I trust you for the journey as well.
When I worked as a television reporter, my worst on air experience was reporting live one evening during a week-long conference.
I don’t know what happened, but as I was speaking, suddenly my train of thought was derailed. I was on national tv and I didn’t remember what I was supposed to be saying. I got stuck. Trepidation set in. It was unbelievable! Yes, thousands of people watching live and I went silent. I wanted to walk away from the camera on live tv. And I can tell you that in broadcasting, silence for a few seconds could feel like a few minutes. It was an AWFUL experience.
Thank God I was able to recalibrate and finish the report, but I felt so badly that I went home, threw myself in bed and sulked. I was so embarrassed. I beat myself up badly.
I remember entering the newsroom the next day and being told by the main news anchor that she knew how I felt. She then gave me good advice: “Dassah, get straight to the point!” I took that and ran with it. This was my career at stake.
Interestingly, despite my public blunder, I wasn’t pulled from reporting live in the evening lineup the next day. That evening and for the rest of the week, I nailed it!
In fact, I was later told that when I was struggling in those moments the evening of the gaffe, the News Director was in the control room saying, “Come on Hadassah. Regroup!” I couldn’t hear her. I couldn’t see her. And I imagine that is just how God is rooting for us to get back on our feet when we make mistakes and fall.
In fact – and this is the amazing part – the next year when that same conference was held, I was bumped up from being the floor reporter to actually being the HOST of the live evening broadcast. And guess what? It was successful with no embarrassing moments. I went on to LOVE live broadcasts! As I now reminisce, all I could say is what has become my favourite quote: ‘Looka God!‘
I brought up this scenario in my life to prove that just as you are sitting there thinking you might not be worthy of that promotion, you don’t have sufficient experience to chair that committee, you don’t have the best grades to intern at that company, you’re not in the click, you’re too dark, you have no degree, you are the least worthy to represent the department, you are too old, too young, you just got hired, when you see UNWORTHY, God sees WORTHY. When man sees you as unqualified, God has already stamped QUALIFIED!
Let me give you three Biblical examples:
When Gideon was told that he would deliver Israel out of the hands of the Midianites, he said, “My family is poor in Manessah and I am the least in my father’s house (Judges 6:15).” But didn’t God qualify him and MIRACULOUSLY delivered his people?
When Sarah was told she would bear a child in her twilight years, she said, “After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also? (Genesis 8:12).” But didn’t God raise up seed for this couple?
When Moses was told he was to go to Egypt and lead God’s people out of bondage, he said, “I am not eloquent…I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue (Exodus 4:10). Didn’t God make a way?
I am one who believes in people being worthy, but I am reminded that our version of worthy sometimes differs from God’s. Let’s not forget in 1 Samuel 16, the Lord “refused” SEVEN of Jesse’s sons before choosing David because “…man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart (7). OKAY!
We serve a God who sees differently and is a system-shifting God. Ecclesiastes 10:7 is amazing and is proof as well! Solomon said, “I have seen servants upon horses, and princes walking as servants upon the earth.” Wouldn’t God shift the system JUST FOR YOU?
What are you doubting God can do? Don’t box Him in.
Have you prayed over and repeatedly for something and still have yet to see it come to past?
Are you tired of praying about that situation, that problem…that desire…that longing?
Are you ready to throw in the towel?
Perhaps one of our issues is we are too focused on what WE want. We are humans and often, it’s all about us and what we desire. But what about what God wants?
My friend, who is a priest, once told me that God is more interested in who we become during the journey as opposed to just getting us to the destination.
As I think about this, it reminds me of a graduation. It’s such a big deal. Lots of bells and whistles. It’s an exciting day…but it’s ONE day. It’s that one day which culminates years of schooling in some instances. And trust me, I love graduations! They are worth celebrating. However, it’s the challenges we overcome, the victories, the failures, the late nights, early mornings, the tears, the difficult professors, perhaps the sitting out a semester for whatever reason…the journey of mountaintop and valley experiences, which all make the tassel worth the hassle. It’s all we have been through to get to that cap and gown, cross the stage, family-cheering moment.
So as you wait on what you have so earnestly prayed for, begin to take your focus off the destination and begin contemplating what God is doing in you during the journey. Is He trying to get you to be more patient? Is He desiring to strengthen your faith in Him? Is He saying, ‘You’re not ready. You want this more than you want me’? Is He saying, ‘My grace is sufficient’?
The reality is waiting can be hard (I know). Waiting can be lonely (I know). Waiting can be frustrating, particularly when we’ve been waiting long AND we see others – including those who do not serve the Lord – receiving some of the same requests we have been praying for (I know that too!). It might be weeks, months, years of prayer for healing, deliverance from low self esteem, a house, that new job, the husband, the baby, the salvation of your son, that scholarship, restoration of your marriage, that financial breakthrough etc. If God were to give us everything we want – and immediately at that – we would have no need to trust in Him. We would see Him as a magician.
So during these early morning hours, as I think about what I am waiting for, I encourage you – while I am encouraging myself in the Lord – to fix your eyes upon Jesus. Do not desire anything or anyone more than Him. Do not compare yourself to others. What God has for you…for me, we will get. Wait patiently. Wait on His timing. Wait faithfully. Worship while you wait. Get busy doing the work of the Lord, while you wait. Don’t waste your wait. Grow through it.
Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord. ~ Psalm 27:14
It’s been long. Far too long. I have not posted anything in this space in nearly three months.
I am led now though to share some thoughts: God has been doing a wonderful work in my life. I am growing in Christ and it is but for the grace of God!
The growth is evident because in recent weeks, I’ve experienced a shift in my atmosphere. Notice, I didn’t say a shift in the atmosphere, but a shift in MY atmosphere.
My thinking has changed. It has evolved. I find myself more interested in doing God’s will than my own. In fact, during my evening worship today, I sang along with William McDowell as he belted out the simple, yet profound words of, ‘I Give Myself Away.’ The lyrics resonate with me:
Here I am Here I stand Lord, my life is in your hands Lord, I’m longing to see Your desires revealed in me I give myself away
I give myself away (I want to be used by you) So You can use me I give myself away I give myself away So You can use me
Take my heart Take my life As a living sacrifice All my dreams all my plans Lord I place them in your hands
Truly, I am at the point in my spiritual walk where I am beginning to divest myself of things I have really wanted… yearned for. I am at the point of: Not my will, but THY WILL be done…whatever that will might be. There are earthly things I desire, but I have decided: Even if you don’t give them to me, Lord I will still praise you, I will still worship you…I will still serve you, for you are God – and God ALONE! I want nothing or nobody more than I want God.
My life is no longer about me. It’s less me and more God. I am more interested in being a light and the salt of the earth than attaining things, accolades etc.
I am here to serve God, sharing the unadulterated gospel of Jesus Christ, in person and on social media. I am reminded of wise King Solomon, who surmised that all of the things in the world and of the flesh are vanity and vexation of spirit. In the end, we can’t take a thing with us. God won’t ask us about our degrees, our followers…our awards. As Jesus commanded: “Occupy till I come” (Luke 19:13); however, we are not to become so occupied that we give Him a backseat to our lives, only telling Him to hop in front or drive when we are on rough terrain. We must allow Jesus to take His rightful place in our lives.
Anyway, just thought I’d give someone some inspiration by sharing my heart. Join me in realizing: Our lives are not our own. Let’s give ourselves to Him…fully. His way or no way. Growing in Christ, Hadassah